Great-Aunt Lilian’s Guide to Beautiful Hands

Photo-Gloves-VaselineMy great-aunt Lilian was the kind of jolly relative that everyone fondly remembers from childhood Christmases. A well-rounded lady with rose-scented face powder, horn-rimmed glasses, and sporting the type of robust handbag that could fell a would-be mugger with one swipe.

But, despite the typical appearance of a retired Black Country woman, my great-aunt had one remarkable physical characteristic – the beautiful hands of a 20-year-old.

From the age of 13 until she retired at 60, Aunt Lil worked for one company: the Phillips, later Raleigh, bicycle company. She spent most of her working life in the pedal department, where the incessant noise left her with a tendency to shout.

However, almost 47 years of handling oily bike parts seems to have preserved her skin like a record-long free paraffin treatment. What’s more, unlike many of her peers, she never suffered from arthritis.

This left me thinking: what was in that oil? Was it petroleum or Lanolin based? Was it genetics, the oil, the continuous exposure to it or all three that produced such extraordinary hands? And, more importantly, could those conditions and results be replicated without the need for a factory, pedals or bike oil?

At the same time, and in complete contrast, I remembered a line from “Sex and the City” where Miranda said: “I like to put Vaseline on my hands and stick them in those Borghese conditioning gloves while watching infomercials”.

Because I had complained about parchment-dry hands at the time, I was actually given a pair of these as a Christmas present. I used them a couple of times and then lazily stuck them in the cupboard “for another time”. But now, it was time – and I put together an experiment.

Just as Aunt Lil would have done in a working week, I put my hands in a petroleum-based substance – good old-fashioned Vaseline – for eight hours a day for five days. The only time I had to do it was overnight, and so I wore the pair of purpose-designed Borghese gloves to bed. Suddenly, I was back to being seven again with chickenpox, and sleeping in mittens to stop me scratching myself.

However, after an initial night of feeling like Mickey Mouse, I soon fell into the routine of larding up like a cross-Channel swimmer, nodding off, and waking up to remove the gloves and examining the results. I was impressed.

My dry skin had become softer. The puckered knuckles had started to fill out and the joints seemed less knobbly. The skin tone was even, and no longer redder around the knuckles. My cuticles were softer and much easier to remove. Even typing seemed easier and less painful for my chapped hands. I was converted.

It also made me think about the issue of arthritis – and similar questions arose: Regardless of diet and lifestyle, did the oil, continuous exposure to it, continuously working with the fingers, or all three help maintain such youthful, healthy and pain-free hands? Could these conditions also be replicated? And could they also help someone who is already afflicted by this disease?

I shall do more research on that and let you know.

Meanwhile, the answer for me to healthier, more attractive and younger-looking hands is a pair of conditioning gloves – or even a pair of cheap cotton gloves – and a tub of Vaseline.

If you don’t have the time or inclination to do an overnight treatment, then try twenty minutes a day: on your journey to work, taking the kids to school, walking the dog, watching TV or during a cup of tea.

Great Aunt Lilian’s Guide to Beautiful Hands: Gloves + Vaseline + 20 minutes per day. No effort, little money, great result. Bargain.

And you can follow the quest for beautiful hands on Twitter @The_RTM

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